WHAT A FOOL I AM!!

What a fool I am!
As a young boy I answered my country's call to arms;
Though I was scared I fought and returned proud, only to have eggs thrown at me.

This lesson I did not learn.
I continued to fight my country's battles for 12 years;
Every secret war that never happened,
Every conflict that Politicians denied.
Where Anzacs of the past returned conquering heroes,
We slunk back into this country time after time;
Shameful reminders of a past best forgotten.

When my time had come I could not give up the fight.
Again I volunteered and this time I wore a suit of blue;
Only the colour had changed.
When ordered to work alone nothing had changed.
I was forever behind enemy lines - alone and afraid, but proud.

As the years took there toll I became a shadow of the boy that had been.

My mind is sick - too much fear for far too long.
My body is sick - too many one sided battles fought for a people that just didn't care.
My soul is sick - too many mind numbing hours alone and unaided.

My one anchor - my one hope, is now gone. My wife has left me.
They tell me I could have cancer - my time is now limited.
I am now to die alone and as scared as that boy was in his first battle.

What a fool I am - No Soldier's death for me.

©Copyright February 2002 by Paul Anforth